Home cleaning services, from £7.95 per hour at Belle Casa
Cleaning services: the ultimate gift for homeowners. They will probably erect a shrine in your honour.

Cath Kidston rose blue oven mitt, £9
Cute, classic, practical and inexpensive.

Fire blanket, from £16.99 at Safelincs
An inexpensive and thoughtful gift that says, ‘Congrats on your new home, try not to die in a kitchen fire’.

Yule Tree-To-Be Kit, £17.75
A green and Christmasy way to commemorate moving into a new home.

Bunny dish rack, £20 at the V&A Museum shop
So cute it’s guaranteed to make anyone forget they’re washing up. (Maybe.)

Articulate! board game, £25 at John Lewis
New mortgage = plenty of future nights in = plenty of time to play board games. Articulate! is the greatest game in the world – if you don’t wholeheartedly agree after one round, I will personally refund your £25. (Not really though.)

Personalised Swarovski-encrusted bottle of Moet & Chandon, from £50
Londoners can drop into the UK’s first pop-up Champagne store at 70 New Bond Street from December 3-28 and order bottles of Moet, hand-customised with a name or date written in Swarovski crystals. Nice touch for a housewarming celebration!

Nebula Chandelier, £381 at John Lewis
Giving a chandelier makes you better than pretty much everyone else at a housewarming party. This one is particularly good, as it looks like it belongs on an episode of Doctor Who.

KitchenAid Artisan coffeemaker, £505 at John Lewis
Attractive and practical, this baby lets you brew, froth, steam, grind and any number of coffee-making verbs. Available in cream or red.

Coffin couch, $USD3,500
Little bit morbid, little bit odd… but surprisingly nice. And made from recycled (but unused) coffins, so bonus eco-points for you.